The holidays are here and with that comes many family gatherings. Some of us anticipate a great time and some of us are apprehensive and dreading them. All families have great joys and along with those, they have personal issues, challenges, some grudges, and some unforgiveness.
During a year, cousin Sharlene may have gotten a divorce, Grandpa George may have just passed away, or maybe your nephew got in some legal problems, some disagreements may have happened during last Christmas that caused great hurt and family members have taken sides. This year, it seems like everyone will have to “walk on eggshells” at the big family Christmas gathering. Ouch!
There are no perfect families, but there are families who handle such struggles better than others. That would depend on how well the family communicates, how they stay out of each others’ business, how successful they are at conflict resolution, if they gossip to each other, if they are competitive, and if they are willing to put conflict aside for the sake of a harmonious gathering.
So, how can we handle walking into an “eggshell” situation? How would the Lord have us think, act, and communicate?
- First of all, pray that the Lord will prepare the way for a pleasant time.
- Determine in your mind that you will not step into a conflict with “guns blazing”
- Work hard at keeping your thoughts positive and staying out of past issues
- Determine you will have no involvement in gossip of any kind
- Be sensitive to those who have suffered a loss through the year (divorce, kids of divorce, those who have lost someone to death, those who can’t be with their loved on for any reason.) Extend the arms of Jesus to them.
- Refuse to argue with anyone, no matter how much they try to “egg you on”.
It can be difficult for grandparents to know what to say or do when their adult child has gotten divorced and they have their own kids with them. What do you say? Do you talk about the divorce? How do you treat these hurting grandkids without hurting them more.
Help is on the way, Grandparents! On Tuesday, December 22 at 2pm ET, Linda Jacobs, developer of Divorce Care of Kids (DC4K), will do an encore Chained No More Talk Radio program called, “Grandparents Raising and/or Helping Grandkids Thru Divorce.” She will give you great instruction on how to handle the awkwardness divorce can bring to all. You can listen LIVE at www.toginet.com or listen to the podcast later that day at www.toginet.com/shows/chainednomore.
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.” Prov. 15:1,2
“The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” Prov. 15:4
Begin praying right now that your time with family will be more pleasant than ever before and be a bright light to your loved ones this years. Think of possible awkward scenarios and determine in your mind how you will handle them and please the Lord. Try it! You may be surprised how things change when YOU change.