All posts by Robyn

Pride and Prejudice

A movie was released in 1995, based on Jane Austen’s novel, “Pride and Prejudice”.  It was beautifully filmed and was rewarded for its excellence.

Jane Austen was born in 1775 into a Catholic rector’s family.  She was schooled at home, so she had a lot of time to write.  She finished her original manuscript of  “Pride and Prejudice” in 1796.  This moving film was a beautiful love story and filled with the challenges of different social classes in England.  Race, social hierarchy, racial breeding and gender struggles were all part of this literary work.

Now, move forward to 2015 and look around and notice that not much has changed in centuries;  they have just been modernized.  We still have conflict concerning differences in race, gender, sexual preference, cultures, religions and social status.  We seem to need to find what’s “wrong” with someone else, so we can feel superior.  Why is that?  Why would our self-worth depend on that?

According to the Word of God, we are all the same in His eyes.  He made each one of us and loves us ALL with an unconditional love.  If we are to be imitators of Christ (Eph. 5:12), then we would love ALL others with unconditional love as well.  Who do we think we are to consider ourselves above anyone else?  WE are equal in the eyes of God Himself!

There are those of us who do not mind “serving” or “ministering” to those “less than….”, but we would not even consider making them personal friends and peers, would we?  Search and evaluate your thinking on this.  Do you live like Jesus?

Look around at the beautiful variety of people God made on this planet!  A magnificent array of color, race, religions, cultures, social status, and ages.  We all have eyes to see the beauty in others, hands to reach out, feet to walk with someone and hearts to love.

“Love one another as I have loved you. Just as I have loved you, you must also love one another.”  John 13:35   This is a direct command in God’s Word of how we are to live.  Now it is our choice to submit our old pride and prejudice to His will or not.  How about you?

Pride and Prejudice?  How about Humility and Acceptance, starting today?

A Weapon of Choice

Are you sick of all the violence in our world?  Every time we look in the paper, hear the news or watch t.v., violence is splashed in front of our eyes.

In our violent world today, weapons come in all shapes and sizes.  In the movies and t.v. shows, we see an overabundance of guns, bombs, knives, fists and any number of other weapons.  Schools, airports, business buildings, and courtrooms have taken security measures that never would have been there a generation ago.

These are examples of physical weapons, but what about verbal, emotional or mental weapons.  The words, “You are a loser!” or ” I wish you were never born”, or “You will never amount to anything”, are all things our Chained No More participants have said their pasts were filled with.  Weapons to the heart.  Along with those putdowns, there is usually physical violence in the home as well.

“Stick and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”?  Really?  NOT!  Most of the time, our bodies can heal from physical injury, but our hearts cannot fully heal from negative words dropped on us about ourselves.

We carry those words with us throughout our lives and they affect our self-worth and confidence.  We, many times, then define ourselves by what we had been told instead of listening to who God says we are.  Here are some examples:

HUMANS – “You are worthless”      GOD – You are accepted and God’s child (John 1:12)

HUMANS -” I wish you were never born”  GOD – You’re born of God and the evil cannot touch you (I John 5:18)

HUMANS – “You will never amount to anything”   GOD – You can do ALL things through Christ Who strengthens you.  (Phil. 4;13)

Now make the truth of the Word your “weapon of choice” every time the enemy tries to attack.  The enemy’s lies, no matter where or who they came from, are from the pit of Hell and cannot have power over you unless you let them.  Stand in God’s Truth!

A Birthday Blog

I am how old?!  Are you kidding me?!  How did it happen that I am in this decade of life?  I still feel in my 30’s; well, maybe in my 40’s, when I get up in the morning.  GRIN

Whenever I celebrate a birthday, I can’t help but look back at my life and see the legacy I had and the many blessings and trials I have lived over the years.  I didn’t begin life in an atmosphere of chaos or trauma.  I didn’t have parents who divorced, took drugs, were alcoholics or were abusers of any kind.

On the contrary.  I was born into a pastor’s family, was loved, cared for, and nurtured.  I was raised to love the Lord, follow Him and serve Him all of my life.  A perfect life, you think?  NOT!

I have had challenges throughout life, I have made mistakes, made poor choices, didn’t always live for the Lord, have had dips in my marriage as well as my walk with God, struggled with issues as a mom, and even wondered what my purpose was in life in general.

Today is my birthday.  I can look back and see where the Lord has led me and now I look forward to what He has ahead of me.  Here are my birthday wishes:

  • I want every day to have His purpose in mind.
  • I want to represent Him well in all I do and say.
  • I want to extend His arms to all I come in contact with.
  • I want my love for others to be His love for them.
  • I want to keep learning and growing, no matter which decade I am living in.
  • I want to be His shadow in ministry, where He gets all the light and I move how He moves.

My life verse?  Ephesians 5:1,2  “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”

Happy Birthday to me.  Where’s the cake?!

#divorce #adult children of divorce #emotional healing

For more inspirational and encouraging resources, go to http://robynbministries.com

Follow Robyn on Facebook and Twitter

D-I-V-O-R-C-E

Divorce is continuing to erode our society day after day. Stats show that, as of 2013, 50% of first marriages fail, 67% of second marriages fail, and 73% of subsequent marriages fail.  We also see that 58% of American children will witness the divorce of their parents before age 18, where as 50% of children in America will witness their parents’ second divorce.

We can see why our society is eroding after reading those statistics, right?  Sometimes it looks like the divorce rates are dropping a bit, but that is because more and more couples are living together without getting married, so when they break up, a divorce is not part of that, however that breakup is another one of abandonment for the kids.  Stats again show that there are over 3.1 million cohabitating with children in our country.

Definition of “divorce”:  “total separation; disunion, to cut off to break the marriage contract”.

I have seen, over 15 years of ministry, the complete devastation of families and individuals because of the shattering of a family.  Children think it is their fault, parents blame each other, kids get thrown back and forth between mom and dad, and everyone is left wanting to know where they belong and where they can find unconditional love.

Where do you go when you want to find answers and healing from all of the pain of divorce?  Well, there are many quality resources to help with issues, help you find healing in Jesus and become able to move forward.  Here are a few:

ADULTS – “Divorce Care”  (divorcecare.org)  Helps adults work through the painful issues of their divorce.

ADULTS – “Chained No More…A Journey of Healing for the Adult Children of Divorce/Childhood Brokenness” (www.robynbministries.com/chainednomore) Helps adults see how they got to divorce in the first place with deep exploration into their past.

TEENS – “The Big D…Divorce Thru the Eyes of a Teen” (sonsetpointministries.com)  A 13-week curriculum for mid and high school kids to work through the hard issues they feel.

CHILDREN – “Divorce Care For Kids” (www.dc4k.org)  A wonderfully age appropriate curriculum for elementary-aged kids to work through how they feel with the family crisis.

SINGLE PARENT FAMILIES – (hlp4.com)  An incredibly helpful website with many articles that address issues of divorce.

These are but a few of the resources that are available for you and your family if you are suffering through the devastation of divorce.  Please look at them.  I wish you great healing and a better future ahead for you and your kids.

#divorce

Where’s the Remote?

What did we ever do before the invention of the t.v. remote control?  Well, we had to get up every time we wanted to change the channels, adjust the volume or turn the set on or off.  We sat closer to the t.v. so we didn’t have to walk so far,  and thus strained our eyes.

In the 21st century, we have universal remotes that allow us to control stereos, DVD and CD players, fireplaces, lights and so much more.  Every day brings more technology and more ways to allow us to stay on the couch or in the recliner.  We can even go anywhere, push a button or two, put earbuds in, and close off the world.

Wouldn’t it be great to have a remote to change the circumstances of our life or make it so we would not have to look at what annoys us?  We could just change the “channel” with the touch of a button or adjust the volume of someone talking to us, if we wanted to.  We could not have to face anything that we didn’t want to; just see what’s on the next station.

We could avoid challenges in our marriage, our work situation, difficulties with our kids, and never have to look at them or work to resolve them.  What an easy way of life, right?  God allows challenges for a reason.  He wants us to grow, to recognize His provision for us, to accept His lessons and ultimately to experience a stronger trust in Him.  If all we had to do was push a button to avoid those challenges, we would never grow or see Him at work in our lives.

II Cor. 12:9,10  “Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecution in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Look at the challenges that are presently in your life.  Why do you think God has allowed them?  Would it be better if you could use a remote control and avoid them altogether, or are you willing to “set the remote aside” and learn His lessons so you can become a stronger child of God?

–Excerpt from “Visions of Him” by Robyn Besemann

For more encouraging resources, go to http://robynbministries.com

Hopes for 2015

What do you hope for this new year?  What would you like to see happen?  What goals would you like to reach?

Do you hope for more peace in your home?  Do you hope for a promotion at work or stronger financial stability?  Do you hope God will bring you someone to share life with?  Do you hope for a family conflict to be resolved?  Do you hope your walk with Jesus will be closer?  Do you hope for better health or maybe some answers to health issues?  Do you hope you get stronger after losing someone you loved in 2014?

HOPE:  1)  “The feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best.”  2) “To look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence;  to believe, desire or trust.”

Most of us have hopes and dreams, but many times we are not willing to “put in the work” to make it happen.  I always say, “Do the work to make it work”.  Let’s look at some examples:

1)  You hope for more peace in your home.  Look inward first…Do you yell, demand, hit, or put others down?  Are you controlling or manipulative?  “Do the work to make it work” and work on your own reactions to those around you first.

2)  You hope you will move up at work.  Look inward first…Do you just expect it to happen or are you getting some more education in your area of work?  Is your attitude positive and do you encourage other co-workers?  “Do the work to make it work” and see how you can be worthy of that promotion.

3)  You hope your walk with Jesus will grow closer.  Look inward first…Are you spending one-on-one time with Him each day?  Do you care that your life does not reflect what He wants it to?  “Do the work to make it work” and make the spiritual adjustments you need to become a stronger child of His.

“Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him.  He alone is my Rock and my Salvation;  He is my Fortress, I will not be shaken.”   Psalm 62:5,6

I hope 2015 will be all you hope it will be and that you will indeed “do the work to make it work”.

For more encouraging and inspiring resources to bring change in your life, go to http://robynbministries.com.

Taking the Tinsel Down

The weekend after Thanksgiving is traditionally when we bring all the Christmas decorations out of storage and I prepare the house for our Christmas celebration.   Trimming the tree, dressing the mantle and piano top, and displaying the nativity scene; the reason for the season.   It is important to have everything just right, so when the kids come home, they are surrounded by family tradition and warmth.  The Christmas mouse MUST be on the doorknob to make it complete. I love this time of year!

The last thing we do is put the angel at the top of the Christmas tree.  After the storage bins are put away, we sit down and enjoy the ambiance of this holiday with Christmas music playing.  Ahhhhhh!  My heart is content and as I look around, I am immensely grateful.

After the parties, concerts, get togethers, and celebrations of Christ’s birth are over, it is time to think about “taking the tinsel down”.  Siiiigh.  Already?  The leftover goodies remain in the frig, the little gifts are still sitting in the boxes to be put away and even a little eggnog is left.  I guess it is time to put Christmas away, right?  Siiiigh again.

But then…..here comes New Years!!!  This New Year’s Day is very special because our Oregon Ducks play in the Rose Bowl.  We will have a few people here to watch the game and finish some of those Christmas leftovers and finish up that eggnog.  Go Ducks!!

I sit here reflecting on 2014 and all it brought and then find myself looking forward to 2015 in anticipation of what the Lord will lead us to do.  A new radio show, at least two more books published and the endless ministry opportunities He will provide.  I don’t know what is all going to happen, but I certainly know He does and that is enough for me!  “Where You lead me, I will follow….”

There will be highs and lows, challenges, struggles, triumphs, victories, heartbreak, great joy, etc., but as long as we remember He goes before us and will lead us through it all, IF we let Him, we can move confidently into 2015 with anticipation and confidence.  Let me leave you with this wonderful scripture for this coming year:

“Love must be sincere.  Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.  Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.  Honor one another above yourselves.  Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.  Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.  Share with God’s people who are in need.”  Romans 12:9-13

So, take the tinsel down and I hope you have a Happy New Year!

Greetings To You

We wish you a very Merry Christmas, whether you are spending it with lots of family, or quietly alone or anywhere in between.

America has made this holiday so commercial and has covered it with tinsel, when everything about the first Christmas was the opposite.  Jesus was born in a quiet stable surrounded by his mom and dad and some animals.  The Christ Child didn’t come into this world with horns blaring or all the hoopla we see today.

Let’s take a few minutes tonight or tomorrow, to listen to music about His birth, put the Christmas lights on or light a candle and contemplate what the first Christmas means to us and our life today.  Let all the busyness and noise fade away and maybe read the Christmas story in the Bible again.  Take the time.

We, at Robyn B Ministries, wish you a sweet time to reflect on the true meaning of Christmas and that 2015 will be full of blessings, joy and spiritual growth for you and your family.  We also wish to thank all of you for your support and encouragement as we continue to build this ministry to guide hurting people to the healing arms of Jesus.  We are excited about what 2015 holds for Robyn B Ministries.  Stay tuned for what He has in store!

Merry Christmas and a very happy New Year!

Christmas Highs and Lows

Our children are here to celebrate Christmas early this year because they will be travelling out of state for the actual holiday.  One good thing is that it propelled us to shop earlier, bake earlier and prepare the house for our family celebration early.  Another benefit is that it has kept us out of the hubbub of the crowds this weekend.  Niiiiiice!

This past week has been somewhat painful for me because not only have we heard about my husband’s 97 year old mother taking a turn for the worse, a young family who lost their 4 month old baby to SIDS, but I have also been ministering to a woman who has had no hope and is thinking about ending her life.

This is where we begin the purpose of this blog…”It’s the most wonderful time of the year…”  and “I’ll be home for Christmas” are only two sets of lyrics that remind us that Christmas time is supposed to be wonderful, warm and full of good cheer.  For many, it is not. There are many in our country who have nowhere to live, no family to connect with and thousands of kids of divorce saying goodbye to one parent while saying hello to another.  Many hurting people can’t wait for the decorations to come down in the stores and streets so they won’t keep being reminded of what they don’t have.

Those of us who are fortunate enough to have a warm, loving family, a home decorated with all the trimmings and wonderful, long-held traditions, it truly is the most wonderful time of the year.  The ministry that God has called me to has made me acutely aware of how grateful I am, but it has also helped me see outside our home and propelled me to include others in the celebration of Jesus’ birth in personal ways.

An invite to coffee or lunch, an open house for those with no family around, sitting with someone new at church or at a concert, giving a small, thoughtful gift, are just some ways to bring the Christmas spirit to those who the Lord lays on our heart.

“Each man (woman) should give what he (she) has decided in his (her) heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”  2 Cor. 9:7

Look around this holiday season and look for the person standing or sitting alone.  What could you say or do to bring some light into their life?  Maybe you could bring a Christmas high out of their Christmas low.  “Tis the Season…”

Need a gift idea for someone you know who is going through some tough times?  Go to http://robynbministries.com/music and purchase Robyn’s CD, “Through the Rain…Crisis To Hope”

To find more resources from Robyn B Ministries, go to http://robynbministries.com

Fruit of the Spirit – SELF-CONTROL

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and SELF-CONTROL.”  Galatians 5

I find it interesting that the final element of this blog of the fruit of the Spirit is SELF-CONTROL during this month of indulgence, don’t you?  December is filled with over-spending, over-eating, over-socializing and  over-indulence in many other areas of our lives.

“Our country is one of over-indulgence  and self-centeredness.  I want what I want when I want it and how I want it.  I will be denied nothing and I will do what I must to get it.”  One look at the Neiman-Marcus Christmas catalog will prove this out!

How can we be SELF-CONTROLLED, as the Lord desires us to be, with all of this around us?  First of all, what are the areas that we may need to adjust, pare down and learn to CONTROL?  Are we in debt because of overspending?  Are we struggling with our weight because of overeating?  Are we having relationship problems because we don’t CONTROL our actions or words?  Secondly, how are we going to learn  to be more SELF-CONTROLLED?

Definition of SELF-CONTROL – “CONTROL or restraint of oneself or one’s actions, feelings, etc.”

This seems to tell me that before we need to think ahead of our actions,  we also need to be aware of our weaknesses.  Where do we lose SELF-CONTROL?

Here are a couple of quotes on the subject of SELF-CONTROL:

  • “At no time is SELF-CONTROL more difficult than in times of success.”
  • “Self-expression is good; SELF-CONTROL is better.”
  • “Character does not reach its best until it is CONTROLLED, harnessed, and disciplined.”

In the book of Titus, Paul is speaking to Titus about what is required of elders.  Here is some of what Paul says… “Since an overseer is entrusted with God’s work, he must be  hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is SELF-CONTROLLED, upright, holy and disciplined.”  Isn’t this what God asks of each of us too?

So, the next time you go shopping, ask yourself if you are exercising good judgment?  The next time you want to “fly off the handle” and yell at someone, hold your tongue and use SELF-CONTROL.  During this holiday season, the next time you are tempted to eat that third piece of yummy fudge…well, you know!

This concludes my blog series on the Fruit of the Spirit.  I hope it has encouraged, blessed and challenged you.

Please visit our Robyn B Ministries website at http://robynbministries.com